「誕生日どうする?」
「ばんえい競馬行きたい」
僕は馬が好きで、特に怪獣のように巨大なばんえい馬を見たかったので、そう答えました。すると、ちょうどプリンスホテルのチケットがある、と慈が言うのです。ただ、道東は釧路か屈斜路のみ。釧路に連絡すると、8日は喫煙室のみ空いている。一方屈斜路は禁煙室も空いているとのこと。これは屈斜路へ行けということではないか?でも正直遠い。車で片道5時間半とか地図を見るだけで気が重くなるレベル。島牧までの片道3時間に慣れている我々ですら遠いと感じてしまいます。
それでも「行くか」と決断できたのは、明治時代の北海道を描いた漫画「ゴールデンカムイ」の存在があったから。アイヌの歴史を肌感覚で体験したいという気持ちが夫婦で一致したことで、ゴールデンカムイに何ら興味のない子どもたちを巻き込んで長旅に出ることにしました。
大英博物館から始まった我が家のアイヌムーブメント
5月末、慈の妹夫婦がイギリスから泊まりに来ました。その時に、「そういえば」と聞いた情報が、大英博物館で日本の漫画展が始まったという話。そしてそのメインキャラクターのようになっているのが「ゴールデンカムイ」のアシリパさん。おおー!あの大英博物館で!?ゴールデンカムイすげー!と興奮したのを覚えています。
慈はその横で淡々とネットショッピングしていたらしい。後日、ゴールデンカムイの単行本が自宅にひっそりと届きました。現在人気沸騰中ということもあり、中古では単行本がなかなか手に入らない。最終的に漫画レンタルして最新刊まで一気読み。特に慈のハマり具合が凄まじく、「寝不足」「超眠い」と言いながら毎晩夜更かししてゴールデンカムイを読みふける始末。遅れて僕も既刊まで読み終わり、晴れて6月を迎え、冒頭の「誕生日どうする?」という話につながるのです。
龍神様のご利益
屈斜路プリンスホテルから徒歩数分の湖のほとりに龍神様の祠があるという話を聞き、朝イチでお参りに向かいました。道路脇の斜面をロープで伝っておりると小さな祠と大きな龍の姿が。
僕は寺社仏閣は好きですが、神頼みは好きではありません。お参りはするけれど「◯◯になりますように」とか願うのは違和感を感じるタイプ。それで「◯◯します!見守ってください」のように誓う形でこれまでお参りしてきました。でも最近なんだかそれも違うような気がして、さらに言えばここにいる龍神もアイヌの神様であって、神道の作法で良いのだろうかという疑問すら感じてしまう。ドラゴンボールの元気玉じゃないけれど、パワースポットというからにはこの地にパワーがみなぎっているはず。それを自分の中に取り込みたいと感じ、龍神の首元に手を当てて念じることにしました。
「少しだけ力を分けてください」と。
龍神の祠を後にした我々が向かったのは車で40分ほどの距離にある摩周湖。到着直後から霧がすごくて一切何も見えない。見えるのは数m先の木の枝だけ。
「せっかく来たのに残念」
と言いながら仕方ないので売店をぐるりと回り、車に戻ろうとすると
「あれ?少し霧晴れてない?」
もう一度展望台へと向かうと、さっきより視界が開けています。湖を眺めているとどんどん霧が晴れてきて、ついに摩周湖がその姿を現しました。
これは龍神様のご利益に違いない!と思わせるほどに、徐々に霧が晴れてくる摩周湖は神秘的で美しい。ちょっと寄り道のつもりが、1時間弱も湖を眺めてしまっていました。
阿寒とアイヌコタン
今回の旅のメインでもある阿寒湖のアイヌコタン。摩周湖からは1時間半ほどの距離にあります。ランチで食べたアイヌ料理はまさしくゴールデンカムイの世界を想定させる味で、「ヒンナヒンナ」と言いたくなります。尾形(ゴールデンカムイに登場する狙撃手)みたいに恥ずかしいので声には出せなかったけど。
ここで見ることのできるアイヌ古式舞踊は神秘的な音律で、子どもたちも観入っていたのが印象的でした。アイヌコタンはわかりやすくアイヌを表現したもの(古式舞踊や料理や木彫りのグッズなど)があって、これはこれで楽しいし感じたものは多かったのだけれど、阿寒湖周辺の山々こそが最もアイヌらしさを感じさせてくれたなと思います。道端から見えるエゾジカや森の深さ、どこまでも続く大自然。アイヌはこの自然の中で生きてきたんだなと感慨深く感じました。
アイヌと北海道と私
ゴールデンカムイを読んで、改めて自分の認識の間違いに気付かされました。北海道は移民も多く、アメリカのように歴史が浅い印象を持っていたのだけれど、北海道には長いアイヌの歴史があります。それはこれまでに自分が学んでこなかった歴史なわけで、自分自身の無知を棚に上げて歴史が浅いなんて思っている場合じゃないよね。いや、今思い出しても恥ずかしくなる。
ゴールデンカムイを読んで、これまで全く考えても見なかった歴史の扉が開けた気がしました。北海道各地だけでなく、樺太や北方領土、千島列島までついつい調べてしまう。そしてとても興味深い。
なんでアイヌは日本国民になったのか
そのことに対してどう思っているのか
アイヌとしてのアイデンティティはどういったもので感じられるのか
いつから和人との関わりがあったのか
樺太の歴史って?
文化の継承は?
ロシアとの関係は?
アイヌの信仰は?
疑問が尽きないのです。帰りの車の中でも慈とずっとそんな話で盛り上がりました。そんな話をしていると、自分と北海道との見えない糸が見えてくるような気がしました。
試される大地が突きつける問い
2013年に移住してから約6年。正直北海道には馴染んでいなかったと思います。北海道にいながらも心ここにあらずという感じで。それは単純に歴史が好きという趣味の問題だったり、自分自身のアイデンティティとも関わってくることなのだけれど、北海道という土地を心から好きになれてなかったのかもしれない。浮気相手みたいな感覚で。
ゴールデンカムイを読んだことが道東へ行くきっかけになったのだけれど、道東で感じた異世界感は衝撃的でした。車で“わずか”5時間で海外にきたような感覚。空気感が違うし、景色が違う。とても新鮮で神秘的。一神教の人には怒られるかもしれないですが、神様だって違うんじゃないかと思えました。
今回の旅のおかげで北海道という土地に対する畏敬の念と愛情が芽生えた気がします。恋愛と一緒で、相手のことをもっと知りたい!って思った時にはもうだいぶ好きになってるんだよね。僕にとってその入り口は歴史だったりするのです。おかげで、「ここで生きていく」というビジョンが見えてきました。これまで北海道に「私との関係どうするつもり?」って試されていたんだ、きっと。自分の軸が定まりつつある2019、誕生日でした。
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